Friday, November 16, 2018
The Top 7 Money Traits in a Partner
Good looks, a sense of humor, a huge….brain. We often look for these things when finding a partner. Given that more marriages than not end in divorce, and most that end, do so because of money stress, have we focused on the right qualities in a partner? While we search for the complete package, maybe adding in a few solid money traits would be a wise move. Today I give you my top 7 Money Traits to look for in a partner. Bring on the Dad bods with good credit.
1) Confidence
Having a high self-esteem is huge. It helps you many ways in life, including with your money. Confidence will help you know your worth so then you can demand that from your employers. Your family life will then be uplifted. You will tackle the tough challenges, work towards lofty goals, battle for your spot at the table and never settle for less. This is a very admirable quality in anyone. Don’t get it confused with cockiness, which is not attractive. I’ll admit the dividing line between the two traits is razor thin, but an in-depth conversation with the person in question should clear up all doubts.
2) Openness
Being open about money is very important. First, if you want to build a life together, you will need to know about each other’s money past. You don’t want things coming up that will nip you in the bud later. You also want someone who will be open about the things that bother them about their own money situation and even more important, yours. You will need an open dialogue about money during your life together or resentment and trust issues can develop. No secrets, just truth, and love.
How To Talk To Your Partner About Money For The First Time – The Bustle
3) Honesty
Similar to openness, honesty is very integral to a successful relationship. I have met couples that literally lie to each other’s face about the money that they spend. This cannot happen. One thing about money, unlike other lies, is that with a little research it all comes out eventually. Numbers are facts and they cannot be hidden forever. This is especially important when you are struggling with money or have debts to pay off. You must be on the same page and that means absolute truth is needed. It is also important when you have a common goal to accomplish. You can’t have one person steering the ship and the other down below drinking beers.
4) Responsibility
Why do most marriages end because of money stress? It’s quite simple. People will always blame the other for their collective problems. We blame the banks because we have no money in our accounts. We blame our co-workers and boss because we didn’t get that promotion. We blame the government because they take too much taxes. It’s only natural we blame our spouse because we are having money issues. The next time you want to blame your spouse because of a money issue, stop. Take a deep breath and relax. Taking responsibility is a massively important trait in a relationship. You must understand that the problems that are created are both of your problems. It is a team effort, and so are the mistakes. While one person may have made the mistake, both of you are on the hook for it. Find someone that is not a blamer, and instead is a leader. Leaders take responsibility and followers blame others.
5) Work Ethic
There is an alarming trend of people being extremely lazy that has taken over the populace. As a person who has been a trainer of new employees I always believe in a simple principle. I can train someone on how to do the job, but I cannot train someone to work hard. Laziness is an extremely unattractive quality in anyone. Put down the video games, put down the beer, and do some fucking work. Let’s be honest, you cannot turn laziness into wealth, it’s just not possible. What that means is that a life of mediocrity is ahead of you. Now there is nothing wrong with relaxing and enjoying doing nothing after a day’s work. The key word is “after.” If you are dating a lazy person, run for cover. It will only get worse over time, trust me.
12 Signs You Are Dating a Deadbeat – Budget Boss
6) Kindness
I don’t care what anyone says, being kind is very, very important. This includes being kind with your money. Showing someone that you care by treating them, remembering important days, and surprising them is so very important. Everyone loves feeling special and most of the time that requires being kind with your money. Pick up the check, don’t forget anniversaries and don’t be cheap. Now, this may seem against most of my principles when it comes to frugality but trust me it’s not. Work within your budget and fit in love as an expense. If that means beer with the boys suffers, so be it. Budgets are all about choices and we all know the saying, “Happy wife, happy life.” It’s true, believe me.
Ways to Show Your Partner You Really Care – Budget Boss
7) Empathy
I saved the most important for last. An underrated yet very important quality in anyone is empathy. Money empathy is quite simple. We need to understand the struggles our partners might be going through. We need to support them in their endeavors to better their lives, and thus our lives. We need to be there for them when they need help and not shut down during a time of need. We also, and maybe most importantly, need to remember that we love them if there is ever a situation where we cannot be together anymore. It always troubles me when divorced couples fight over money as if they want to ruin the other person. Fair is fair, and a lack of empathy causes people to destroy themselves while trying to destroy another. One of the toughest things in life is the ability to put yourself in someone else’s position. While you may never fully understand what they are going through, you can at least be empathetic to their situation. It truly is the cornerstone of a healthy society and a healthy relationship.
Why Empathy Is Your Most Important Skill (and How to Practice It) – LifeHacker
I fully admit no one is perfect, especially me, but knowing these money traits and working towards bettering them in ourselves, is an admirable task. While we know we will never be perfect, we can at least strive to not be destructive to ourselves and the ones we care about.
“Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail.” – Kinky Friedman
Email – joe@budgetboss.ca
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