Boss Blog: February 1, 2017

Marriage…..The Long Scary Walk

Getting married can be terrifying. I envy the people who are completely, no fear, 100%, in it to win it. It just doesn’t seem that simple to me. The Beatles said, “All you need is love.” Seems about right, doesn’t it? What about Tina Turner? She said, “What’s Love got to do with it?” Okay, let’s just assume you love each forever and ever. Step one, check. The part that really gets me scared is the money side of it. I sort of see marriage as a business transaction. Please don’t hate me all my amazing female friends. I think when you jump into a something like this it should be fully and completely. So what does that mean? Here is my checklist when it comes to taking the plunge, financially speaking of course….

1)      Weddings are damn expensive!!!!

So in early January, I set up a booth at the Bridal show at Western Fair here in beautiful London, Ontario. Being one of the only financial professionals there I got to see what the wedding industry is like. An average wedding can cost upwards of 20K! Cough, cough, puke, puke. Fancy weddings sometimes run up to 50K!So let’s go out and spend the down payment for a nice house on one day so our friends can eat for free, and drink till they pass out. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying don’t get married. What I am saying is that weddings are damn expensive!!! So start saving now. Actually, start saving yesterday. What is the worst that can happen? Everyone gives you a bunch of money as a gift and you get it all back. Plus it’ll get you in the habit of saving for big purchases as a couple. There are many more to come, believe me.

2)     Teams are not one person, this isn’t the Montreal Canadiens

So you want to get married. It’s time to merge finances if you haven’t already done so. That means shared bank accounts. That also means making financial plans as a couple. Open up joint investments, TFSA, RRSP, etc. They don’t have to be shared but make sure both of you are on board with the plan and contributing to the goals. The time for selfishness is over. Just remember this is not like going splits on a pizza, this is going splits on life. Organize your finances and set up commitments. It has to be done, so do it. A dual income can be a sweet thing.

3)     Think of the worst, and protect that love

So you love your girl. Your girl loves you too. Birds chirp and all that. The question is: “How deep is your love?” (Killing it with the music references I know). Is your love deep enough to make sure nothing will ever happen to your loved ones? Well just like Forest Gump said, “Shit happens.” That includes injury, illness, and death. What would your loved one do if you got hurt? What would they do if you died? These are gross things to think about but at the same time loving someone means protecting them. Protecting them means insurance. I know I’m biased but in my opinion but protecting yourself can be one of the most selfless things you can do. Does it cost money? Sure it does. Sadly It costs much more if you are unprotected.

4)     Be Basic

What I mean by this isn’t what you might think. When it comes to living with the person you love for the rest of your lives, it should never be about money. So now you say, “This whole article has been about money, what are you talking about?” Yes, finances should be taken into consideration when taking the plunge. What shouldn’t be taken into consideration is upstaging your friends. Get married, have fun, but be smart with your money. Just because everyone is doing it doesn’t mean you should. The fancy house, the nice car, the beautiful vacations are all just things. They are things that mean nothing if the marriage ends due to financial distress. (Most divorces occur due to money by the way). Be lean and mean and forget the Jones’. You probably weren’t invited to their wedding anyway.

I conclude this article with a quick story about my favorite married couple. 30 years ago they got married at City Hall in Brampton, Ontario. Sign the papers and let’s go. Keep the car running. During the early years, they went through many financial hardships and even tough times with each other. They powered through that to raise two kids. A high school dropout and his wife got to see one of their sons go to university despite never earning a great income. With hard work and determination, they became homeowners, including rental properties. They found their dream home on a 7-acre lot in the country. She now spends her free time swimming in their pool. He spends his riding through the countryside on his trike motorcycle. Over 30 years ago my parents got married and they are now planning what they are going to do during retirement. At age 57 and 51 they are mortgage free and ready to think about the rest of their lives. For that, I couldn’t be more proud. Maybe Tina Turner was right?